Jennifer Lehr, MFT - Blog

Emotions and Emotional Release

Posted on Friday, November 5th, 2010 at 7:18 pm.

Emotions are intense.  They rock us.  We have to deal with them. Someone says something the wrong way, or we are in a difficult situation and all of a sudden we might find ourselves in a fury, or in deep grief, or perhaps an awful sense of embarrassment and shame as if we are ‘bad’. …   Read more »


Posted on Monday, August 16th, 2010 at 11:07 am.

This past week, some very specific events brought up a lot of pain and grief for me. The first event was when I read an article about a 17-month old boy who was beaten to death.  The perpetrator stated “I didn’t hit him that hard.”  Later in the week, I saw the Time magazine cover…   Read more »

A Radical Change In Perspective

Posted on Monday, July 5th, 2010 at 11:58 am.

The other day, I heard enlightenment defined as a radical change in perspective. What is enlightenment? Why would we want it? Is it not to gain deep revelation or insight into the meaning and purpose of things, to be removed from our everyday perspectives that cause us so much angst and pain? I not only…   Read more »

Sometimes Our Potential Lies in Our Wounds.

Posted on Sunday, June 20th, 2010 at 7:22 pm.

This week I was reading some old writing I had done and ran across a piece I had written 14 years ago in 1996.  This was shortly before I went back to school to become a therapist and it made me aware of the evolution of my thinking and growth as a human being. “I…   Read more »

When Wounds Collide

Posted on Tuesday, April 6th, 2010 at 2:55 am.

When wounds collide, we suffer and we don’t feel safe. Our partner becomes somebody we no longer trust. It is one of the most painful aspects of a relationship. When we are scared, we act in ways that do not help our relationships. When we feel safe, our relationships can blossom. Do you remember O’Henry’s…   Read more »

Looking Inward – Making Sense of Ourselves

Posted on Sunday, March 7th, 2010 at 4:42 pm.

I witness a lot of pain in my work. People don’t come to see me because everything in their lives is working. They come to see me because something isn’t working, because they are in pain. When I first sit down with someone, I’m looking for the pain. What is happening that is so difficult?…   Read more »

How Past Trauma Impacts Current Relationships

Posted on Sunday, October 18th, 2009 at 7:36 pm.

“The more quickly either person goes from disappointment or hurt to anger, defensiveness, or emotional withdrawal and remains stuck there, the less that person is capable of having a relationship and the more the other person will have to walk on eggshells.” – Mark Goulston Why do some people have relationships that work and others…   Read more »

What If I Decided That My Life Is My Friend?

Posted on Friday, September 18th, 2009 at 7:42 pm.

As I watch people struggle in their lives (and because it is not my life I often have more perspective then they do), I sometimes see what they need to let go of. Maybe they are getting sick because it is the only way they can begin to relate to their body with real love.…   Read more »

Becoming a Playful Spirit

Posted on Thursday, June 18th, 2009 at 7:47 pm.

Have you ever watched a child play? They have fun and explore within the context of what they know. Before they can walk, they play sitting. With each developmental step, the range of their play increases. As adults, we have the ability to play in bigger and bigger ways. But sometimes we don’t. Instead, sometimes…   Read more »

Anatomy of an Emotional Victim: Changing Victim Consciousness to Self-Empowerment

Posted on Wednesday, March 18th, 2009 at 7:50 pm.

Sue and her husband Dave were talking in the morning before leaving for work. Dave mentioned that he had made dinner plans with a friend later that week. Sue immediately bristled. “You never make plans with me, everyone else is always first”, she hissed. Dave sighed. “Here we go again,” he thought to himself. He…   Read more »

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